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Fri, Jul. 30th, 2004, 10:38 pm

strolling down engin level7 all the way to engin bridge makes me wanna cry.

i kept having flashes of everything dat had happened to me since i came into nus.

a usual 5mins walk seemed endless.

sometimes when terrible things happen, i dont break down immediately.

and after a few days, when everything sets in, i start to cry like there's no reason to stop.

even a bus ride home was unbearable.

Thu, Jul. 29th, 2004, 12:59 am
i hate toshiba.

period.

bring back, oh bring back, oh bring back my laptop to me, to meeeeeeeeeeee~~

sigh.

just brought my poor laptop to the hospital for brainwashing. and guess wad? it came back with more problems than b4. i wonder y.

i felt so handicapped without my dearest laptop. think i'm getting too dependent on it. thank u dear for working on my laptop for the whole day. if not for u, i wouldnt even be typing this right now.

went out with zhiyun & yuling today. they were the ppl who accompanied me through those dreadful days in njc - the days when i was yearning to go back to ny. we werent very close then..not as if we're very close now. sure there were awkward silences but at the end of the day, it all turned out well.

oh yes, this may be a little late...but HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY DEAREST GEN! *HUGS* :)

Sun, Jul. 25th, 2004, 08:59 pm

You say you wander your own land
But when I think about it
I don't see how you can
You're aching, you're breaking
And I can see the pain in your eyes
Says everybody's changing
And I don't know why

So little time
Try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody's changing
And I don't feel the same

You're gone from here
And soon you will disappear
And fading into beautiful light
Cause everybody's changing
And I don't feel right

So little time
Try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody's changing
And I don't feel the same

So little time
Try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody's changing
And I don't feel the same

Oh everybody’s changing and I don’t feel the same

Sat, Jul. 24th, 2004, 10:36 pm
pieces of me.

trying to pick up the pieces of..me.

one whole week of oweek dry run left me really exhausted.

esp yesterday's fright night..which lasted all the way to 5am in the morning. by the time we bathed and walked over to lt7a, it was slightly past 6am and everyone was alr sleeping all over the place. some on the cold hard floor, others on the benches and tables. it was raining heavily by then..and it was FREEZING cold. dear even brought jacket for me. it was really sweet.

"watch out for the corners.."

heh.

it was pretty tiring being a ghost. but i had fun scaring ppl anyway. i also enjoyed singing and dancing wif stef & gen while waiting for the grps to come. e1 corridor is such a very nice place to sing. heh.

looking forward to oweek itself.

Tue, Jul. 20th, 2004, 10:15 pm
i'm so thankful i haf frens.

sorry stef..lemme borrow your nick for today. :)

thank u harkkah.
thank u stef.
thank u gen.

most of all,
thank u dear..

i'm feeling better today.
at least i had a proper lunch and dinner.

was playing badminton this morning when this song just came into my head..

"i'm nothing special in fact i'm a bit of a bore..
if i tell a joke, u've probably heard it before.."

Tue, Jul. 20th, 2004, 12:14 am

feeling f***** up.

i only had a can of peppermint green tea for lunch. a cheeseburger for dinner. didnt even feel like eating.

seeing him didnt help a single bit.

Mon, Jul. 19th, 2004, 12:40 am
this is such a very meaningful and nice song..

I'm not a perfect person
As many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You [x4]

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

Mon, Jul. 19th, 2004, 12:06 am
i hate myself.

why do tears flow so easily..

i hate myself.

Sun, Jul. 18th, 2004, 10:04 pm

was it all a lie?

all of them..

all 700 of them..or maybe there were 800.

was it bcos i was the one present at that time?

it could have been anyone..

anyone as gullible..


was i just..a fling?

Fri, Jul. 16th, 2004, 10:17 pm
tired.

i'm so tired.

goodnight everybody.

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